Saturday, June 12, 2010

Doggy News!!!!

Hello, my name is Ripper! I am three years and two months old male. I am an Indian mixed breed with black and White Fur. I have five knuckles on each limb and I wanted to network too. So I asked my mom to give me her laptop for sometime however she refused. Now that she has gone to do my shopping and as usual forgot to turn the comp off , here is my chance.

Let me tell something to all of  you human kind! We are so nice, so loyal, the best kids that you have. Only because we speak a different language you think you are better than us?

Unlike complicated humans with too many dialects (to what you take pride on) we are so simple, Our language is “Bow Wow “. I am here to share something about our culture, our opinions on you and our likes, interests, hobbies and passion.

To begin with, our culture is too simple, we all speak the same language so it is easy to communicate no matter whichever part of the world we land in, we can easily mix with humans, our religion teaches us to be nice and loyal. Per our religion, we have to be cordial, understanding, playful, innocent and have an attitude of our own. 

My opinion on you all is simple, you human"s make simple life so complicated, and of course if effects us as we do not want to watch you sad and suffer. My favorite game is fetch! My mom got me a new toy which actually was an imitation of a news paper. The headline was breaking news to us, “Man bites Dog”. I knew that human kind is weird but not that weird. Come on, leave this to us and we bite only when we really know you deserve it! Unlike you we do not use guns, bombs, biomedical and chemical tools to destroy your own kind. 

My hobby is to sleep, play, act cute (when I do anything wrong and I know she would be mad at me), play fetch, listen to music(she is a musician and Rock n Roll is awesome), watch other humans and laugh. And most of all when I am happy and sleeping I sleep on my back. I am very passionate to my Mom and love her, the only thing I don’t like is she doesn’t give me curry! She says it is not good for my stomach. But she makes it up with lot of other stuff.

Since she keeps telling me to practice and to be a smart Dog, I have decided to be a journalist and write about all the atrocities you humans do to us for fun. We get hurt, unlike me , there are not any other of my kind that I know who are good in communication and know your language.  So I would jump in whenever she is out to give you feed and more update of my world and news that you can use!


Harkirat said...

Very enjoyable read.....Mums the word when Mums back I guess.....Shh Puppy dont tell her you been naughty on her PC and seen all those saved folders under the secret code too....I know yoy wont, or else she is gonna lock her folders and make a 6 digit code,you have only 5 on ur paws!!

The wizard said...

I am loving it. I certainly will, my mom is asleep now so I am here, I pushed her as usual and she turned he other side,now the web is mine!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

ankit said...

Most of us think dat we humans are noble souls on the journey of life striving to reach our potential and make our life succesful.

However, on our path we witness greed,hypocracy,selfishness, self esteem deeply inherited in our roots which for all obvious reasons is a human nature. I'm not blaming god. I'm blaming society.

Like you and like everyone I know I'm not selfish, greedy or a hypocrate then why we meet such people or such curcumstances (be it war or!!!)

Who is pure or sacred.I dont know. I worship myself....and seek to learn from this celestial creature!

I own one too...;)

ASWANI said...

This is brilliant stuff. Loved going through it. Hmmm...I agree to it. We human beings need to learn from these creatures. We really lack many of the things as being stated by this cute doggie...its high time, we change ourselves and make our life worth living :D